January 2008
5 posts
ok. so i might find it personally amusing that at 12:55 on a wednesday night i am, frankly, exceptionally stupid and rolling around in my bed like a paraplegic with aspergers. (imagine that. i dare you.) anyhow, alas, this is a) predictable of both me and hacky writers in general, a tribe with which i now feel genuine kinship; and b) does not conveniently mesh with my professional...
Just what type of morning does one need to be having in order to justify, say, inhaling a large carry-out container of cold pork fried rice? Purely hypothetical question.
Gawker editor shops memoir →
for the record, i’m going to shop my memoir about how i’m just about to turn twenty fucking eight and omg i’ve learned SO much about life and love in my hardscrabble experiences online. update: congrats to galleycat on the sorta-oversell. (and no, i’m not making fun of sheila here. i’m making fun of all the people who immediately asked me if i was writing a memoir....
LedgerFrenzy: A look inside the new-media...
4.45 PM
coen: heath ledger dead
rovz: what?
coen: interrupted news right now
coen: put it up now
coen: channel 7 news just reported
coen: gogogo
rovz: oko ok ok
4.45 PM
coen: um, you ready for the shocker du jour?
lock: yes
coen: heath ledger is dead
coen: they just interrupted commercials during oprah
lock: WHAT?
coen: um yeah
coen: ah on p6.com
lock: holy
coen: omg page six has a siren.
lock: wowzers
coen: right?!
coen: how fucking crazy is that???!
lock: jesus
lock: on broome street
lock: no less
4.45 PM
neel: holy shit heath ledger died
4.47 PM
coen: on p6.com now
rovz: link them?
coen: you could say saw it on the news, page six confirms
coen: throw noe some love
rovz: they say it was a drug overdose. do we say that?
coen: say that they said it
coen: AP on it now too. just get it up.
4.50 PM
coen: talk about celebrities you didn't expect to die today.
lock: for serious
coen: brad renfro, like, ok. he was off the charts.
coen: but heath fucking ledger? serious a-list actor?
lock: lock: dude shoulda stayed in brooklyn - Joey: traded it all for the bright lights of the big city - look where it got him
coen: you two.
lock: it's the only way we know to numb the pain
lock: drudge siren
4.50 PM
coen: it's like the whole world just found out during the same 10 minutes
rovz: during the same 5 minutes
rovz: that was amazing
4.51 PM
lindsay: RIP Heath Ledger!
coen: i know
coen: like, omg
lindsay: What a big ass celeb funeral that's gonna be
coen: i think the whole world found out in the course of 10min
lindsay: yeah
lindsay: wildfire
4.55 PM
lock: ok, this is funny
lock: Subject: New York Sun Breaking News: Heathcliff Ledger Dies, Police Say
coen: SHUT UP
coen: can you fwd that to me?
5.00 PM
coen: now i've got someone making the joker jokes
rovz: oh God
coen: you realize that in the course of 20 minutes we've gone from shock to spreading news to horror to sad, and now we're at humor?
rovz: I'm not ready for humor
coen: me neither!
coen: i'm a little horrified by how quickly that happens
rovz: though I did laugh when the CNN reporter said "we BELIEVE his ex-wife Michelle Williams was in Brokeback Mountain as well"
5.00 PM
lindsay: my personal contribution is "Renfro/Pleshette/Ledger: MLK Week '08"
coen: pleshette?
lindsay: suzanne pleshette died
coen: i don't even know who that is.
lindsay: it's ok
5.00 PM
coen: surrounded by sleeping pills.
lock: yup
coen: suicide
lock: joker crying on the inside
coen: GOOD ONE LOCK
lock: har, the news just swept the curbed office
lock: people here are a bit slow
coen: you guys are too busy chronicling subprime shit
lock: joker jokes officially over, 21 minutes after the news hit
lock: time to start working the reax to the reax angles
lock: like, are we SURE they finished ALL filming on the batman flick?
lock: what if he still had some voiceover work to do?
lock: it's too much to contemplate
5.05 PM
rovz: ooh, look how nice the apartment was! corcoran.com/property/listing.aspx?Region=NYC&listingid=1100251
coen: um link that
rovz: ok
5.10 PM
coen: i don't see denton in the live footage of paparazzi at the bldg door
lockloct: eesh
5.15 PM
lock: wait, this was mary kate's apartment?
coen: what?
lock: someone just made that claim here
5.15 PM
coen: have you heard that it's mary-kate's apt? could be total rumor bullshit, lock said someone said it over there
rovz: it was on Perez
coen: plausible?
rovz: she lives in Soho?
rovz: I don't know, I'm sure it's plausible.
rovz: funny, TMZ just reported "EXCLUSIVELY" that he's dead
rovz: not like them to be behind CNN
coen: i'm sure they'll get the toxicology reports
coen: and pictures of the pill bottles
5.15 PM
bossman: i can't believe heath ledger dies
bossman: nevertheless, well done getting that up so quick
5.20 PM
bossman: we flicked over to the homepage during the presentation
bossman: and everyone saw the headline and went "what???"
5.20 PM
lock: joey: "would probably be in poor taste to do a 'what other units are available in 421 broome street' post"
5.20 PM
lindsay: broome street??
5.20 PM
rovz: I'm pretty sure it was his apartment
rovz: otherwise why would his housekeeper be there?
coen: yeah
5.25 PM
lindsay: haha, on the page six post:
lindsay: Related Articles Heath Ledger and Yet Another Blond Girlfriend; Ladies, Look Who's Single!
lindsay: I just read that mk olsen owns the apt
5.30 PM
coen: it IS mk's
coen: sewell chan on the case
lock: wacky times
lock: dude sewell chan IS the scene
lock: ha, crappy valleywag splice on gawker disrupting denton's coverage
lock: that amuses me greatly
coen: pretty funny
5.30 PM
bossman: omg
bossman: they just threw mary-kate into the mix??????
coen: HA
coen: yes, it's MK's apt.
bossman: how could this get any better from a tabloid perspective?
5.35 PM
coen: it doesn't. i hate myself
5.38 PM
levy: they took heath from us too soon
coen: seriously
coen: such crazy late-day tabloid action
levy: and ashley olsen
levy: once again, RUINING THINGS
coen: nnono
coen: MK.
levy: no
levy: mk's apt
levy: ashley was there tody
levy: THERE TODAY
coen: WHAT?
coen: where is that?!
levy: gawker
levy: that ashley can't leave well enough alone, can she?
5.40 PM
coen: jesus, ashley was there today?!
rovz: well, that's a rumor gawker is reporting
rovz: is it confirmed somewhere?
coen: no but it's a good rumor
rovz: it is a good rumor
5.40 PM
coen: ASHLEY WAS THERE TODAY?
bossman: i saw, yeah
bossman: that's how it gets better
bossman: heath was having sex with ashley in mary-kate's apartment
coen: no. NO.
5.45 PM
levy: son of a bitch
coen: first lance, now this.
levy: EXACTLY
levy: leave our heros be please
levy: LEAVE THEM BE
coen: ha
levy: seriously, though
levy: ashley was involved
levy: wow
coen: you don't know that for a fact
levy: i don't really care, jc
levy: the mere suggestion
levy: there's a chink in the armor
levy: in the olsen armor of invincibility.
coen: they never had armor, ben
coen: they were so fragile
levy: non-fact
coen: need i remind you of the cirque lodge?
levy: they wanted you to believe they were fragile
levy: so when they KILL
coen: they can take their victims by surprise.
6.10 PM
levy: any updates?
levy: is AO in custody yet?
coen: HA
coen: that would be amazing
levy: here's one to blow your mind
levy: what if she is now WITH CHILD?
levy: and it's his?
coen: love the way your mind works
levy: now that would be something
levy: i think we can agree
levy: if two celebrities are alone doing drugs
levy: they're also having intercourse
6.10 PM
lock: any new hot breaking intimate details??????
coen: yes!
coen: i just put on pink underwear!
lock: YES!!!!
6.44 PM
lindsay: ha, on the way home I was thinking I was going to make a joke when alex got here "let's go up to broome street and look at the media circus." and then I just read your blog!
6.45 PM
lindsay: (I hadn't seen the post you linked to or any pics of the apt)
coen: yeah denton ALL over it
lindsay: crazy. I'd be so embarrassed to even be there!
lindsay: ok, just signed on to say that!
Here's the thing.
Tumblr is an attractive time-suck only to those who “write” on them. For everyone else reading, it’s like looking at a puddle of vomited minutiae.