Jessica Coen

What to Wear During the Blackout Apocalypse

Fri, 02 Nov 2012 16:15:01 -0400

One (1) pair of leggings or any other jegging-esque bottom with an elastic waistband, which will prove reasonably comfortable during both long periods of immobility and short bursts of activity (like getting up to light candles).

One (1) pair of sweatpants with 5 days’ worth of crumbs and stains on them. Wear these whenever you are not wearing the leggings. Sleep in them. Wear them while trying to give yourself a kitchen sink-bath in the dark. Run errands in them. Do everything you can in these sweatpants and save the leggings for times when you need another human being to respond to you in a positive manner, like when hailing a cab. Do not hail a cab in sweatpants… Read More

What America Needs Now: Clinton/Booker 2016

Fri, 02 Nov 2012 14:44:12 -0400

jezebelcom:

Fuck this election. We’re looking toward the future. Clinton/Booker 2016. Hillary for prez; she holds it down on a global level. Cory Booker for veep; he’ll save your grandma from a burning house and then invite you over to chill, while quoting Frederick Douglass. America needs this now more than ever: Something amazing to look forward to. Look at that image by the incomparable Jim Cooke. Don’t you feel better already? Clinton/Booker 2016. Pass it on.

FEMA Panda will relieve your hurricane woes.

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 10:40:49 -0400

jezebelcom:

(Original image via Getty.)

jezebelcom: Unlike Dogshaming, the offending companion animals...

Wed, 31 Oct 2012 13:37:51 -0400

jezebelcom:

Unlike Dogshaming, the offending companion animals featured in CatShaming appear proud of what jerks they are.

And make no mistake: cats are total assholes.

via cat-shaming.

Since Gawker Media’s servers have been reduced to an...

Wed, 31 Oct 2012 12:36:11 -0400

Since Gawker Media’s servers have been reduced to an underwater shipwreck of sorts, Jezebel’s blogging from our special POST-HURRICANE EMERGENCY BLOG. Come on by.

Also, I made a ridiculous banner/header image, which makes me cackle because I am cold and dirty and without power and losing my goddamn mind.

Back when the GOP was amusing.

Fri, 07 Sep 2012 10:55:35 -0400

Back when the GOP was amusing.

chanzero: The Kids of Winterfell Wow. They really grow up fast...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 12:49:58 -0400

chanzero:

The Kids of Winterfell

Wow. They really grow up fast in the North.

THEON! STAND UP STRAIGHT YOU ASSHOLE.

Well-played.

Tue, 22 May 2012 17:16:34 -0400

Well-played.

It's rare that I sincerely talk up Jezebel.

Wed, 09 May 2012 18:20:00 -0400

But there have been some particularly great posts this week (and it’s only Wednesday!). Talented ladies (and a gent) writing really good stuff:

What We’re Really Talking About When We Talk About Hillary Clinton Without Makeup by Erin Gloria Ryan
When Motherhood Never Happens by Dodai Stewart
Being Mean to Fat People Is Pointless: A Good Old-Fashioned Plea for Civility by Lindy West
Maurice Sendak Had Little Tolerance for Bullshit, and Other Fond Memories by Erin Gloria Ryan
Boys Who Talk About Girls by Foster Kamer

(Okay, done being sincere. WORK SUCKS OR WHATEVER.)

(Why so many parentheticals?)

curtcole: My favorite moment on television tonight…possibly of...

Mon, 02 Apr 2012 00:13:53 -0400

curtcole:

My favorite moment on television tonight…possibly of all time. OF.ALL.TIME.

Yo, I'm Sorry, But I Don't Know Shit About Hunger Games

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 15:46:31 -0400

Yo, I'm Sorry, But I Don't Know Shit About Hunger Games:

yoisthisracist:

But this Jezebel post seems to encapsulate what I’d have to say fairly well.

maureenoco: Recap of Denton’s Today Show segment, part 4.

Wed, 07 Mar 2012 13:06:47 -0500

maureenoco:

Recap of Denton’s Today Show segment, part 4.

whatevs: fimoculous: GLORY DAYS. Lock’s mullet here is...

Wed, 07 Mar 2012 12:16:17 -0500

whatevs:

fimoculous:

GLORY DAYS.

Lock’s mullet here is GLORIOUS.

Foxy Jazzercise 4LIFE!

Hello 2005! If I knew then what I knew now, I’d still not know much of anything.

thedailywhat: Badvertisment of the Day: Chris Duncan says he...

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 13:45:40 -0500

thedailywhat:

Badvertisment of the Day: Chris Duncan says he was casually browsing Facebook last night when he stumbled upon a familiar face in one of the website’s ubiquitous ads.

Staring back at him from some scammy looking insurance comparison site banner was none-other-than infamous 9/11 ringleader Mohamed Atta.

Venturing a guess as to the motive behind the use of a notorious terrorist in a throw-away Facebook ad, Duncan says they probably thought “A 9/11 hijacker can’t sue me for using his likeness.”

That he cannot.

[cdncn / copyranter.]

The only thing worse than cleansing is going off the cleanse.

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 10:06:48 -0500

The only thing worse than cleansing is going off the cleanse.

[via]

Wed, 11 Jan 2012 10:28:46 -0500

[via]

Even though it would probably destroy my sanity once and for...

Fri, 06 Jan 2012 15:44:54 -0500

Even though it would probably destroy my sanity once and for all, I’d love this setup. Scary good.

felixsalmon:

@antderosa, King of Social Media. Things to note:

iPhone so heavily used that it needs to be plugged in

iPhone used as a phone

Two different TweetDecks

Standing desk

Typing one-handed with his left hand

Button-down collar unbuttoned

Bottle of Champagne awaiting its next sabering

Pen and paper!

Just one question remains. How on earth does Soup get cellphone reception in the middle of the 19th floor of a skyscraper in Times Square?

daniellenuss: Oh January.

Wed, 04 Jan 2012 16:46:05 -0500

daniellenuss:

Oh January.

mattchew03: Since nobody else had, I took it upon myself to...

Mon, 19 Dec 2011 13:36:01 -0500

mattchew03:

Since nobody else had, I took it upon myself to make this. #NotoriousKIM #RIPLilKim

Couldn’t resist, sorry. Back to work, everyone.

It’s a fair question.

Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:28:27 -0500

It’s a fair question.